Saturday, June 9, 2012

The End of You Missing Me

I don't think that anything
Will ever hurt me as bad
As the end of you missing me
It's like I'd never really lost you
Until the moment of realization
That I never cross your mind
And I prayed every night for a year
"Please don't let him him forget me"
But you forgot me
And sometimes I feel
If I don't exist in your thoughts
Then I don't exist at all
I used to be
Your first call
And I can't get that back
No I doubt I'll never recover
From falling out of your mind

Saturday, June 2, 2012

The Saddest Thing

What would be the saddest thing?
To die without scars?
To miss all the best sunsets
Because all are too busy attending
To unimportant matters?
To never kiss in the snow?
Or dance in rain?
Will I regret the pain?
Or the avoidance of it?
Is the saddest thing to settle
For your heart's second choice
To be your life's companion?
Or to not realize
That one can rarely grow
Without overcoming the fear
Of being alone?
Is the saddest thing to understand
Too late
That it costs something
To be who you are?

I Lie

I lie
You cry
But the truth would kill us
And tears can dry
I play
You stay
I doubt I'll ever understand
How we got this way
I bleed
You bleed
We just won't admit
I'm not what you need
I fight
You bite
Inside we both know
Something just isn't right
I miss
You kiss
Tonight we can agree
Ignorance is bliss

Maybe I Should Have Cried

Maybe I should have cried
Maybe then you would have known
How much your leaving hurts me
How could you leave me on my own?
Maybe I should have shook my head
When you asked if I'd fine
Instead of promising I'd survive
A life without you mine
Maybe I should have blocked the door
And pleaded that you stay
Instead of just pretending
I wanted it this way
Maybe I should have spoken up
And tried to change your mind
Does this mean you never loved me?
How could I be so blind
And it probably wouldn't have mattered
If I'd begged you not to run
But at least I'd know then what I did
Was all I could have done

Don't Haunt Me Tonight

Please don't haunt me tonight
You're just a ghost
A phantom of the person
I'll always love the most
But now I need a love that's real
I long for someone I can touch
Instead of only feel
So please don't linger now
You need to set me free
You need to let me go
I'm tired of avoiding streets
So I don't have to feel you
It hurts to be here
With you gone
But I am
And I need to move on
Because if I can find
Another love that's real
Maybe I can heal
A little
So please don't haunt me tonight
Let me learn to be alright
On my own

Mirror Lies

Mirror, mirror, on the wall
The fairest one you cannot know
But all the girls still flock around
And believe the image that you show
Pick me, pick me, the girls all say
To be the one to shine today
With lovely hair and sparkling eyes
They worship you and believe your lies

I'm Always Late Now

I'm always late now
I was never late before
When you were here
But now there is so much danger
In idle moments
I can't be left alone
With my memories
So I try to fill every minute
With something else
Anything else
I'm so tired of trying to stuff my mind
With random things
So that I can go on with life
Without you
But perhaps someday I'll learn
That the only thing worse
Than the pain of missing you
Is constantly trying to avoid it

It Hurts To Miss You

It hurts to miss you
But it hurts just as much
To try not to
I hate that I can't stop thinking about you
But I'm so tired of constantly trying
To think of something else
Of anything else
I hate those moments when I swear
I can almost feel you next to me
But I hate the moments more
When I feel nothing but emptiness
I don't want to love you
But I can't think of anything worse
Than never loving you again

The Wrong Road

I was on the road
To having everything
That I was "supposed" to want
A successful and lucrative career
A caring and devoted husband
A nice house in a nice area
Clothes and furniture and cars and vacations
And I really tried to want it all
But I didn't
I just wanted to be alone more
And see more sunrises
And catch up with old friends
And smell more flowers
And read more books
And play more songs
And write more stories
And take more pictures
And watch more films
And have more conversations
That keep me up all night
And I wanted to laugh more
And spend more time on beaches
And ride more waves
And drink more wine
And climb more mountains
And drive along the coast at sunset
So I did